I was sitting at the bar…

I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

“Well, whatcha’ gonna do about it?” he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears. “Come on, man,” the biker says, “I didn’t think you’d cry. I can’t stand to see a man crying.”  

“This is the worst day of my life,” I said. “I’m a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don’t have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife with another man … and then my dog bit me.”

“So, I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all. I buy a drink, I drop a capsule in it and sit here watching the poison dissolve. Then you show up and drink the whole damn thing!

But, enough about me, how are you doing?”

15 thoughts on “I was sitting at the bar…

  1. LMAO!!!
    “2Th_3:12  Now them that are such we command and exhort by our Lord Jesus Christ, that with quietness they work, and eat their own bread.”

  2. LMAO!!! Poor guy just can’t win, even when he wants to end it all. Like the government taxing you, even after you’re long dead.

  3. Hey Paul, This joke reminds me of a true story that happened to my cousin…you’d have to know him to really appreciate it…he’s a big guy, a know it all and always on the dole.
    It was Christmas Eve a few yrs back when he decided to visit a local bar. After having a few drinks while sitting on a bar stool with his back to the bar, he turned back around to face the bar, only to discover two shot glasses there before him containing a green liquid. (this is the way he told it to me) He thought to himself…free Christmas shots…so being the kinda guy he is, he helped himself to one. After a couple more of what he was drinking prior to this, he said he didn’t feel so well, so off to the toilet he dashed only to fall short of his goal and proceed to shite himself drastically. On his way out the door he asked the bartender what was in those shot glasses, to which he replied…”Oh that’s just a mixture of soap and other cleaning products I use to catch flys”. Yes he’s an idiot. but he’s “our idiot”

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