Published on May 21, 2014 by The Onion
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Seeking a more humane method of carrying out capital punishment, Ohio’s new machine yanks inmates heads from their bodies using painless, powerful robotic claws.
4 thoughts on “Ohio Replaces Lethal Injection With Humane New Head-Ripping-Off Machine”
The only thing better than her smooth delivery are the graphics of the ‘Head Ripping Off Machine’ in action.
The post ripping off processes for the body & head are equally impressive as well.
That thing sure would deter some of those murderous thugs out there (no, I am not talking about the cops).
I always wonder, who funds the Onion…?
Excellent point, what is the motivation to finance such a thing?
Great for politicians.
Slowed down to pulling about a quarter of an inch an hour, of course.
Give ’em plenty of time to contemplate their crimes against humanity.