Published on May 21, 2014 by The Onion
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Seeking a more humane method of carrying out capital punishment, Ohio’s new machine yanks inmates heads from their bodies using painless, powerful robotic claws.
The only thing better than her smooth delivery are the graphics of the ‘Head Ripping Off Machine’ in action.
The post ripping off processes for the body & head are equally impressive as well.
That thing sure would deter some of those murderous thugs out there (no, I am not talking about the cops).
I always wonder, who funds the Onion…?
Excellent point, what is the motivation to finance such a thing?
Great for politicians.
Slowed down to pulling about a quarter of an inch an hour, of course.
Give ’em plenty of time to contemplate their crimes against humanity.