Trencher Alert: Randy’s Memorial

Randy’s family has set up a memorial for him in Bryan, TX on February 24th. It is NOT what he wanted in any way, form, or fashion. However, they don’t care. This is for Them and they will do it Their way. They don’t approve of what he wanted and don’t care what he wanted, much less me.

I am flying down on the 21st and back to NYC on the 28th (what would have been our 10th Wedding Anniversary) to perform my duty as Widow. I will drive the car back with his ashes later, when the weather is better and I get word from the National Cemetery in Houston.

12 thoughts on “Trencher Alert: Randy’s Memorial

  1. So sorry they’re not even respectful of one’s final wishes, Angel. Please drive carefully and be sure to soundtrack his road trip. A little driving music with your gal goes a long way ­čÖé

  2. Walk in grace, Angel. You are the true honoring of his wishes and I know he will accompany you through this forced experience. It will be like you and he have an inside joke that no one else can laugh at. I’m thinking of that old saying: “Keep a stiff upper lip.” I just looked it up in Wikipedia to see if I have the meaning right. Here’s what it said:

    “One who has a stiff upper lip displays fortitude in the face of adversity, or exercises great self-restraint in the expression of emotion.”

    Well, that’s one option. Of course there are other options, too, but I’m sure you’ve already considered many varied responses. – ­čÖé

    Will be thinking of you, Angel.


  3. Sadly, we can’t choose our family. I’m so sorry you have to endure this…been there, lived-through it. A safe journey and strength to you.

  4. Good for you, Angel, for wanting to do the service his way, not their way. One should ALWAYS do what a deceased family member wants done, even if it pisses off people who were supposedly their friends (fair weather friends, that is!), or even family members who thought differently. It is too bad that folks other than you, his wife, will do what they want, so to speak, and deny Randy’s wishes. When my husband’s mother died last year (one day after our anniversary…ironic, eh?) and we did what she wanted, not what her so-called friends wanted, boy were they pissed at us, and still are. Because she did NOT want “friends” who actually betrayed her at her memorial service. And she was right to do so. God be with you, Angel!

  5. “This is for Them and they will do it Their way.”

    You have my deepest sympathy, dear one. You’ve had more than your share of misery and adversity to deal with, without this added b.s. on top of it all. I hope you’re able to do what you need to do, with as little aggravation as possible. I pray for safe travels, and peace of mind for you, Angel.

    I really miss seeing your comments here. ­čÖü

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