12 thoughts on “Captions?

  1. “What? Is there somethin’ on my face?”

    “I don’t understand why even gals that said they liked me online spray raid on my face when they first meet me?!”

    “I proved I was dedicated. Now can I work for you, Terminix?”

    “The guy who did it said chicks would think of it as a 10,000 finger massage bed, but I don’t know…?”

  2. One word – RETARD.

    I know exactly where he got the idea, though…

    “Tool: [to Lee] I got a great idea. Why don’t you let me doodle, like, a Charlotte’s web on your head? On the top of your head. You know, something different, something exciting. ‘Cause you got one of them perfectly shaped domed, muscular heads. I could put a web on the top of the head. Maybe a pregnant Charlotte coming out of your ear, peeking around, making sure them bugs don’t come inside. Her long legs dangling down your neck. Yeah. Sexy, right?

    Barney Ross: Very sexy. He looks thrilled.”

    He just went a wee bit overboard with the concept. 🙄

  3. Spider? Alien face-hugger? Whatever. As long as he doesn’t start demanding a special restroom and “safe spaces”, I don’t care.

  4. Lost a bet, passed out coma drunk, advertising wizard or maybe he was really ugly and this is the improvement. I hope he never needs CPR, that would be a bet on its own.

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