The SimpliSafe Social Distancing Sweater

Dec 14, 2020
What if SimpliSafe could protect your holidays like it protects your home? Protect your holidays this year with The Social Distancing Sweater. The only sweater that helps people come together while staying 6 ft apart.

11 thoughts on “The SimpliSafe Social Distancing Sweater

      1. You better be wearing one when you come over next week. And I have two yardsticks for each of us in case the sweater malfunctions. I’m so grateful for this company keeping me safe, and at the same time, FASHIONABLE.

        🙂 🙂 🙂


          1. It’s a yard stick, silly, so 6′. Just like Orwell said. But my neighbor, Karen, is making me a new one that is 6 and a half feet. She is so on top of it, and giving the yardstick a whole new proportion.



      1. Of course not, sis.
        I was suggesting that some diaper faced degenerate is gonna use it on the wrong John, or Jane, and be transformed into a spastic tripod until the battery is dead. 😉

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