Young men giving up on marriage: ‘Women aren’t women anymore’

Life Site News – by Hilary White

Fewer young men in the US want to get married than ever, while the desire for marriage is rising among young women, according to the Pew Research Center.

Pew recently found that the number of women 18-34 saying that having a successful marriage is one of the most important things rose from 28 percent to 37 percent since 1997. The number of young adult men saying the same thing dropped from 35 percent to 29 percent in the same time.  

Pew’s findings have caught the attention of one US writer who maintains that feminism, deeply entrenched in every segment of the culture, has created an environment in which young men find it more beneficial to simply opt out of couple-dom entirely.

Suzanne Venker’s article, “The War on Men,” which appeared on the website of Fox News in late November, has become a lodestone for feminist writers who have attacked her position that the institution of marriage is threatened, not enhanced, by the supposed gains of the feminist movement over the last 50 years.

“Where have all the good (meaning marriageable) men gone?” is a question much talked about lately in the secular media, Venker says, but her answer, backed up by statistics, is not to the liking of mainstream commentators influenced by feminism.

She points out that for the first time in US history, the number of women in the workforce has surpassed the number of men, while more women than men are acquiring university degrees.

“The problem? This new phenomenon has changed the dance between men and women,” Venker wrote. With feminism pushing them out of their traditional role of breadwinner, protector and provider – and divorce laws increasingly creating a dangerously precarious financial prospect for the men cut loose from marriage – men are simply no longer finding any benefit in it.

As a writer and researcher into the trends of marriage and relationships, Venker said, she has “accidentally stumbled upon a subculture” of men who say “in no uncertain terms, that they’re never getting married.”

“When I ask them why, the answer is always the same: women aren’t women anymore.” Feminism, which teaches women to think of men as the enemy, has made women “angry” and “defensive, though often unknowingly.”

“Now the men have nowhere to go. It is precisely this dynamic – women good/men bad – that has destroyed the relationship between the sexes. Yet somehow, men are still to blame when love goes awry.”

“Men are tired,” Venker wrote. “Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.”

Feminism and the sexual revolution have simply made marriage “obsolete” for women as a social and economic refuge, but this is a situation that should not be celebrated by feminists, Venker says.

“It’s the women who lose. Not only are they saddled with the consequences of sex, by dismissing male nature they’re forever seeking a balanced life. The fact is, women need men’s linear career goals – they need men to pick up the slack at the office – in order to live the balanced life they seek.”

A cross section of research data from the Pew Research Center for the last months of 2012 shows the alarming trends for marriage and child-bearing in the US. One report published in mid-December said that the latest census data showed “barely half” of all adults in the United States are currently married, a “record low”. Since 1960, the number of married adults has decreased from 72 percent to 51 today and the number of new marriages in the U.S. declined by five percent between 2009 and 2010.

Moreover, the median age at first marriage continues to rise with women getting married the first time at 26.5 years and men at 28.7. The declines in marriage are “most dramatic” among young adults. Just 20 percent of those aged 18 to 29 are married, compared with 59 percent in 1960.

“If current trends continue, the share of adults who are currently married will drop to below half within a few years,” the report said.

Moreover, the link between marriage and childrearing has become disconnected in the minds of the so-called Millennial generation, those between 18 and 29. While 52 percent of Millennials say being a good parent is “one of the most important things” in life, just 30 per cent say the same about having a successful marriage, an attitudinal survey found.

The gap, of 22 percentage points, between the value Millennials place on parenthood over marriage, was just 7 points in 1997. The research found that Millennials, many of whom are the children of divorce and single-parenthood themselves, are also less likely than their elders to say that a child needs both a father and mother at home, that single parenthood and unmarried couple parenthood are bad for society.

36 thoughts on “Young men giving up on marriage: ‘Women aren’t women anymore’

  1. I didn’t marry a native North American woman

    I had my reasons , and many but not all were covered as to why in this article
    I also didn’t get married until I was 43
    Had plenty of “relationships ”
    With women from my country , but none I would enter into the contract of marriage with

    And every day , my choice is reinforced with just about every female I have run across since
    The brainwashing is working very well, and 98% of them don’t even see it , let alone realize they even act the way they do

    I happen to love and respect women as gender , brought up in a house full of ladies , and a family on both sides filled with women
    Just not how many of them have become and facilitated by our legal system and how it’s destroyed how a real woman should act and show respect herself

    And .. the Fken drama , can y’all just get past that shit already ?…jeeze life is short

    1. Scenario from a novel by Taylor Caldwell(female), can’t remember title right now.

      Man and two women dining out, one of the women was good friend with man, other woman was hot, sexy, babe.
      Hot woman leaves to use restroom, in mean time woman friend asks man if he is planning on marrying other woman. Man’s reply, no, she is an interesting past time for now, and I’m getting sexually fulfilled, so why should I marry her, besides, I want a woman that will be a lady, not showing her wares to every man but myself, and she should be capable of caring for my children.
      Sad commentary for women, but should be known as to what a man truly desires.

      1. I should say , Nothing I typed above was sent in any disrespect , I very much respect the opposite gender

        My Wife is exceptionally pissed about all the other women out there “blowing it for her type”

        She likes the the fact that there are things a woman does best and things a man does best and we are to compliment each other in our daily lives as a team , and shes very much against when women push to do a “mans” job, when she feels they arnt even doing thier job to begin with, but look to “one up” a man just to boast about it

        ladies be ladies and men be men , dam what a concept eh? too bad the lines are so far blurred these days some men act like women and some women act like men , and some people are not even acting like humans anymore

        to address the part of your comment where a man likes the “look” of a woman .. I know plenty of women that their eyes work the same way , lets face it .. how far do things go , if your not physically attracted to one another ? , and its not a sin to be attracted to someone who takes good care of their body and looks , and has the good attitude to go along with it

        1. “someone who takes good care of their body and looks”…
          Not the issue, this is healthy. Issue is, does man want every other man drooling over his scantily dressed woman, knowing that other men are mentally viewing her as a piece?
          Does a woman want to be viewed as such?

          1. “”does man want every other man drooling over his scantily dressed woman, knowing that other men are mentally viewing her as a piece?””

            some men , ? probably ,, because they need to have their little manhood propped up with reinforcements that shes good enough for him(sad)

            Real men , Not so much ..I like my wife to look female for sure ,, but no advertising for the purpose of other men to hawk over

            some women are doing it on purpose even if they are married , because they dont respect their man( possibly he gave her a reason ?) , or respect themselves that much either

        2. I like your comment and agree with you and your wife.

          Feminists are destroying things for non feminists.

  2. We’re all going our own way. Marriage isn’t worth it when they entire system is stacked against you.

    1. this is a big problem .. and it is not a fair shake for the men for sure

      I am 1 of those men who actually fought and gained full custody of his 5 year old daughter .. so you know how good I had to look in the eyes of the Family Court System , and Yes it COST me big time

      all the egg donor had to do was show up in court and she was considered a winner just F-ing being there , she was so arrogant about that fact, in reality that helped me prove who was the right person to gain full custody
      My grown Daughter to this day still thanks and hugs my neck that I took the time to be her Full time Father part time Mother

      1 thing the Judge did tell her.. the kids are not JUST YOURS HONEY.. He has rights too

    2. One thing I’ve learned is that women can be the cause of great sadness and suffering. It’s an association of diminishing returns which ultimately leaves a man as an empty husk, a shadow of his former self.

  3. I was married once. NEVER AGAIN!
    I haven’t even been on a date since 2009.
    That’s why I like the adds in the sidebars.
    Apparently, all these beautiful women from all over the world want to date me.
    I’ve never felt so popular.
    I especially like the one add that pops up from time to time that looks like half a tomato with worms in it.
    It reminds me of watching C-SPAN.

    1. I was married once. Had a house that I paid for before even meeting her and lost it in the divorce. Lived in my car for months after that and I’m just barely getting on my feet. I count my blessing that I never had children with her. Now I avoid women like a plague. Never want to go through that again. They can not be trusted.

    2. I hear that.
      I got raped in family court in Vegas.
      A couple more years of child support and that’ll be one less government agency to threaten me.

  4. After 3 marriages I now believe women get married because it’s an early retirement plan… with or without you….

    1. Three marriages. ..
      You must have balls of steel.

      I would say you deserve a purple heart for performing and surviving under battle field conditions.

  5. I never even dated, just going to public school with both eyes and ears open was enough to convince me for life I want NOTHING to do with anyone in any kind of “relationship” PERIOD! It’s gone worldwide though, not just the US, looked into Europe and my god have they castrated the entire Swedish “male” population with feminism.

    This world needs a good ole biblical apocalypse, Sodom and Gomorrah on steroids restart.

  6. Not to step on anyone’s toes, but any man who has the idea he is going to marry, or is married, is lost by having everything backwards.
    This article is even more valid now than when it was written several years ago.
    If you find a woman who wants to be a good one (and there are a few out there) be ready to teach, and teach some more.
    It’s a lot of work.

  7. That’s why I married an Asian woman. They are traditional, compassionate, understanding and actually look and want to be women and not some crazed feminist. Most of the women in this country (not all) are crazy, due to our wonderful indoctrination system of brainwashing women into feminist man hating people. That’s just my take on it.

  8. Any man thinking about marriage should just take a look at the ones who are. I don’t know any married guys that are happy. They seem pissed off almost all the time. I just avoid them as much as I can.

  9. Guess our situation is slightly different from those most of you have had. Got married as a 17 year old, husband 19, told by many we would never make it. Well, we celebrate our 50th anniversary on 9/2/2017. We have farmed together for 30 years, so not only marriage partners, but business partners as well. Tough times at time? You bet. But if the commitment is there, not run anytime you hit a speed bump in life, you can make it through the tough times. We also went through the death of our only son, something that can sometimes pull couples apart. But we made it!

  10. I married myself.
    I want a divorce but I will not agree to it.
    The courts want me to split the property equally. But I feel that because I cheated on myself, I should get it all.
    I have children. They are clones. They now want everything I have. I should know. They are me.

    That was from the future……a very messed up future.

  11. One thing I learned about marriage early on and hear the EXACT same thing from men all over Amerika: The two of you walk up the isle, the man says, “I do” and the woman says, “I don’t anymore”. The rest of your married life is complete misery. Absolutely zero sexual interest from your wife who refutes your intimate and romantic efforts time and again for YEARS. Finally, you just lose interest and quit trying…for which you get bitched at. Gradually you find that you just don’t give a shit about much of anything anymore…making money, keeping up the yard or the car or the garden…I mean, what the hell for? All your efforts go unrewarded anyway…I’m sure my testosterone levels have bottomed out now as I feel little drive to succeed in life anymore. I have failed as “a man”. I can’t pique the interest of the woman I fell in love with. It’s now been almost 13 years since we’ve had sex, but I swore an oath. Sigh…
    Like others here, I would strongly suggest to any guy reading this who is thinking about popping the question to bravely reconsider surrendering your competitive drive, your life’s desires, your masculinity, self-worth and self-identity as a man.
    Have you ever looked at successful men either today or through history and wondered how they’re different? Notice that 99% of them had mistresses!!! A friend pointed out that nearly everything ever invented or created was done for nooky!!! By trying to impress a woman, guys have come up with some cool inventions over the years.
    I’ll close my rant with some pearls that a wise man once gave to me:
    If it flies, floats, f*cks or drives, RENT IT! It’s cheaper in the long run.

    1. “Mama said, son you gotta understand, if you want a woman you gotta act like a man.”
      I got married at 17 and everything you put in this comment did not occur, in fact quite the opposite, right up until today. Of course I’ve always been a real man and my woman has always been a real woman.
      I’ve been looking at these comments, and no real insult intended, but if your life is this out of order you might want to look in the mirror to find the culprit.

      1. I was just getting ready to comment and saw yours, and I agree with you whole heartily, and of course, no offense to any of the commenters.

        Man is man, woman is woman, each take care of particular realm, love and forgive, disagree and forgive, fight and forgive, live and let live, enjoy.

  12. I’ve been married three times. All they wanted wss money.

    Never been happier, now that I’m by myself. Trust is gone.

  13. Just look at all these pathetic loser women nowadays that are everywhere unfortunately since most of them now have such a rotten personality and have no respect at all for us good men. Unfortunately it has become so very extremely dangerous for many of us men just to start a normal conversation with a woman that we would really like to meet. They will usually Mouth Off to us and walk away anyway most of the time and once in a while you may have one just smile at you if you’re that lucky which doesn’t happen that much often. It is very sad how the women of today are compared to the old days when love back then was very easy to find for the men in those days just like our family members did. Very obvious why there are so many of us single men nowadays since we really Can’t even blame ourselves at all since it does take two to tango.

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