Brad Paisley – Online


I work down at the pizza pit
And I drive an old Hyundai
I still live with my mom and dad
I’m 5’3 and overweight

I’m a Sci-Fi fanatic
Mild asthmatic
Never been to 2nd base
But there’s a whole nother me
That you need to see
Go check out MySpace

’cause online I’m out in Hollywood
I’m 6’5 and I look damn good
I drive a Maserati
I’m a black belt in Karate
And I love a good glass of wine

It turns girls on that I’m mysterious
I tell ’em I don’t want nothing serious
’cause even on a slow day I can have a three way
Chat with two women at one time

I’m so much cooler online
So much cooler online

I get home, I kiss my mom
And she fixes me a snack
I head down to my basement bedroom
And fire up my Mac

In real life the only time I
Ever even been to L.A.
Was when I got the chance with the marching band
To play tuba in the Rose Parade.

Online I live in Malibu
I posed for Calvin Kline, I’ve been in GQ
I’m single and I’m rich
And I got a set of six pack abs that’ll blow your mind

It turns girls on that I’m mysterious
I tell ’em I don’t want nothing serious
’cause even on a slow day I can have a three way
Chat with two women at one time

I’m so much cooler online
Yeah I’m cooler online

When you got my kinda stats, it’s hard to get a date
Let alone a real girlfriend
But I grow another foot
And I lose a bunch of weight everytime I log in

Online I’m out in Hollywood
I’m 6’5 and I look damn good
Even on a slow day, I can have a three way
Chat with two women at one time

I’m so much cooler online
Yeah I’m cooler online
I’m so much cooler online
Yeah I’m cooler online

3 thoughts on “Brad Paisley – Online

  1. I think I’m a little guilty of this.

    Ahhhh, sometimes a confession lightens the load. Thanks, Angel.

    🙂

    .

    1. I have to give credit to Katie for this one.
      She reminded me of the song in this thread:
      http://fromthetrenchesworldreport.com/word-trenches-june-27-2017/201778
      The song cracks me up.
      However, it’s true. Very SAD commentary of our time, but True.
      Makes me think of many I’ve run across…some harmless…some trolls…some wanna-be con artists (like the one that tried to con #1 in his Craigslist roommate ad)…

      Definitely not You,, galen. LOL You are not, in no shape or form, that kind of loser. 😀 <3

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