Huffington Post – by Katherine Brooks
It’s official: Burning Man has a bug problem.
According to a blog posted to the Burning Man website, the rumors that tons of tiny insects have infested Black Rock City — the site of the Burning Man’s desert revelry scheduled to begin on Aug. 30 — are all true. According to even more Twitter updates, the bugs are biting, crawling and being all-around bummers in Nevada right now. You heard it from blogger John Curley first: “They get up and in you.”
So who else is freaked out by the great #BurningMan Plague of 2015? http://t.co/iVsOHPnct1 pic.twitter.com/Q4vkfAeG13
— Chris Messina (@chrismessina) August 19, 2015
Curley, a photographer who’s currently in BRC helping to construct the modest infrastructure that greets Burners on the playa, goes on to explain that some of the organizers already on site have encountered a mess of insects that are leaving a trail of red welts in their wake. “What’s going on?” you might ask.
“We don’t know,” Curley states in his post. “We don’t know how the little critters survive in the heat and the sun. All we know is that if you pick up some wood, you’re likely to uncover hundreds or thousands of the things. They’ve blown up inches deep against the sides of the Commissary tent. They’ve covered the carpets at the Depot. They’re all over the Man Base. So it’s not a localized occurrence, it’s everywhere.”
EVERYWHERE.
https://twitter.com/BryanWarner775/status/634026087660433408
Curley and his cast of bug-bitten desert people have a couple theories on the insects’ origins. Maybe the biters have been laying dormant all spring, and and recent bouts of rain have brought the hell beasts to life earlier than usual. (*Raises fists in the name of climate change.*) Or, maybe the teeny agitators “hitchhiked in on a load of wood from somewhere.” Compelling. It’s certainly a better guess than the one Shade — a source we assume is human, and not just a physical manifestation of darkness with communicative abilities — gave Curley. Johnny Bugseed? Pshaw.
No word on how the Burners plan on decimating the interlopers. There has been talk of nukes. So far, news of the creepy crawlers is only slightly affecting the amount of pre-Burning Man enthusiasm on Twitter.
#BurningMan is invaded by something more grotesque than techie billionaires: bugs! http://t.co/rQozwTo4K7 pic.twitter.com/VltqHpbdeQ
— SF Weekly (@SFWeekly) August 19, 2015
Wait. Did you hear that? Ah. That was the collective exhale of millions of people who once again said “f**k no” when asked whether they’d enjoy spending days in the desert, bartering for water and food like a couple of Renaissance fair-goers who only wear tutus and glitter speedos.
Note to all those very respectable people still seeking the fiery comfort of an artistic effigy: If you start seeing diseased livestock and thunderstorms of hail and fire, know that the apocalypse is upon us.
Nothing better could happen to this commie-fest!
Stop ingesting the fluoride and SSRI’s, let your damned head clear,
and live in reality already….
My guess is since the Feds weren’t able to get their own private camp set up at burning man, they found something else to screw with partygoers and this looks like the Feds have found a new crowd control method.
Israel has skunk water. The Feds have millions of tiny bugs that bite the shit out of you. Last year they had a rain delay, how convenient. This is all too convenient. All planned.
The bad part of this is the people attending this will have everything they own infested with these bugs and when it’s over they will drag these bugs all over the country going home.
Those look like Box Elder bugs, and they don’t bite. They have a huge orgy fest every 8-10 years and they are everywhere. This is their year to make babies.
You obviously didn’t read the article because they claim the bugs they are infested with are leaving red welts on the skin; meaning these bugs bite.
Those pictures show a bug that looks exactly like the Box Elder bugs swarming all over the High Sierra desert where I live, I have not known them to bite.