Weekly World News – by Frank Lake
CAMBRIDGE, MA – A groundbreaking study has determined that 83% of the members of Congress are certified morons!
The Kennedy School of Government did a longitudinal study over the last 30 years that looked at the average IQ of members of Congress – the Senate & House of Representatives.
The study found that, despite the many advanced degrees from prestigious universities, and despite the fact that many in Congress are millionaires, the average IQ of U.S. Representatives is 101. The average IQ of U.S. Senators, is surprisingly, even lower at 98.
“We spent one hour a month with each member of Congress over the last thirty years. We gave them a number of IQ tests – including math problems, verbal problems and analytic reasoning problems. The results were consistent year-in-year out. Members of Congress are morons,” said Professor Thomas Turley of Harvard.
So what is a moron? A moron is a person whose IQ is less than 100 on a consistent basis.
The lowest IQs were typically the leaders of the two-parties.
In response to the study, Senator Harry Reid said, “Is that bacon?”
John Boehner said, “Go Buckeyes!”
Nancy Pelosi said that she would have to read the study before she could make a comment on it. But, before reading it, she said that she thought it was “stupid.” People who do studies at Harvard are stupid. It’s just stupid to do studies about morons. Who funded this?”
Nancy Pelosi approved the funding of The Moron Study back in 2009.
83% is a large number of morons, but is it the same percentage in the general population?
“Only 7% of normal citizens are certified morons,” said John Murtaugh, the leader of the Harvard Study. “Except in Hollywood. The rate there is close to 49%, but that’s still nowhere near the level we find in Congress.”
So, why do Americans keep electing morons?
“Morons have one common strength: the ability to dupe intelligent people.”
Many are suggesting that potential candidates be given an IQ test BEFORE they are allowed to run for Congress.
But that idea was shot down by Congress.
Sent to us by Bob Byrne.
8 thoughts on “Study: Congress Filled with Morons”
Weekly World News FTW!
Long Live BatBoy!
The author of the study needs to here my statement. Thank you Mr. Obvious!
Satire is supposed to be obvious, Millard.
Otherwise, what would be the point? LOL
Hey #1, good to know your still here!
❓ Did I go somewhere I don’t know about?
LOL Never left, to the best of my recollection.
Haha, who knew!
And in other news headlines: “Water is Wet” Story at 11.
Well Nancy, stupid is as stupid does!
Those 4 at the top says it all. Not only would they sell their mother out to make a deal, they would send her C.O.D.