The Dog Catcher Scam

Continuing to write about the scams being dreamed up by local cities and counties, I have one more story to contribute.

Yesterday, Sunday, I came home to a warning by my mother that a visiting neighbor had called her from her cell phone as she was driving her van down the street we live on in Black Diamond, Washington.

She related to my mom that she had seen a blonde-haired lady in a blue shirt with a clipboard wandering up and down the street going door-to-door.  ‘She was the dog catcher’.  

I was asked to immediately close the large electric gate out front of the house in order to block access to anyone who might unofficially or officially wander onto the property without our permission.  No sooner had I closed the gate and exited the garage, a blonde-haired woman in a blue shirt with a clipboard was eagerly waving to me through the fence.  It was the same woman that the visiting neighbor had warned us about.

“Excuse me, sir.  Do you live here?”  I looked at her like a person who did not understand English as I formed my response.  “Sir, are there any cats and dogs unlicensed on this property?”  I responded, “I am afraid that I do not live here.  I am just a contractor doing work.”  Disappointment shot across her face.  “I will just leave some information for the homeowners, then.”

In a hurry she went to the next victim living besides us.  Luckily, they were not home.

I felt as if I had just been ambushed.  Imagine the likelihood of a surprise attack on Pearl Harbor on a Sunday morning.  This lady had been kind enough to at least wait until the afternoon to begin her ambushing of the neighborhood.

I speed dialed as many neighbors as I could and told them to bring in their pets…a revenue agent would be there in no time to pick their wallets.  I was lucky enough to contact a few neighbors before I got the call from my twin brother.  “Hey, I just got a yellow slip pinned to the front door.  While I was out washing my car some lady wandered into the yard through my opened gate.  She left what looks like a ticket.  On it is written ‘I saw your calico cat hanging out on the porch.  It is unlicensed.  You have three days to complete a form in person or online or face a $150.00 ticket for keeping an unlicensed pet in King County or it will be euthanized’.  Great.  The cat and dog Gestapo had arrived.

Whatever had happened to entering someone’s property without a warrant?  How much money would this cash-strapped county be scooping up from those who still had part-time jobs?  Why now?  Where were these cash collectors five-years ago?

What would come next, a license to breathe?

And folks wonder why the government is so disliked.  My brother will be paying for a $60.00 (annual) pet license for ‘Cutie’.  Luckily, he still has a job.

© 2013 Sean T. Taeschner, M.Ed.

18 thoughts on “The Dog Catcher Scam

  1. Wow this communist garbage never ends does it!
    The city where I live, Billings Montana, also has a law of cats being licensed and even on leashes…
    That law is never enforced and few residents even are aware of its existance.
    Like the former governor of Minn….Jessey Ventura sp? said….upon his time in that elected capacity….
    You can’t legislate away human stupidity….although this article references more taxes, you get what I am saying…
    With all its faults and future uncertainties our form of government is yet miles ahead of that of china, russia and so forth….
    I read recently of the magnitude of Laws Passed Here In The USA, since the beginning of our fellow country men began doing so….The length of those laws one after the other, blows the rational mind to envision….I’ll send the article to Henry and he can decide to post or not….
    This town in Wash State, with this law, should make it to SNL….shouldn’t it?

  2. My Fellow Americans:

    Although I can understand the ostensible response given by Sean to this communist dog catcher,.. allow me to illustrate what I would have said:

    ME: Parking vehicle

    Her: (Waving thru the gate) – Ecxcuse me,… do you live here?

    Me: (Since I already know who she really is…) Go F*k Yourself.

    Her: Excuse me?,.. I’m sorry,.. I’m just wondering if your the home owner.

    Me: Go F*k Yourself.

    Her: Excuse me!,.. I’m the local code enforcement for licensed animals!!…

    Me: Go F*k Yourself.

    Her: Well sir,.. I’m just looking to see if you have ANY unlicenesed animals here…

    Me: Go F*k yourself.

    Her: Well sir,.. I may have to call the cops and have them assist in this matter!

    Me: Go F*k yourself.

    Her: Sir,.. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNLICENSED ANMIMALS HERE??!!

    Me: Go F*k Yourself.

    Her:… Hmm,… well sir,.. I see you are being completely uncooperative,.. I shall make note of that and send it to the Party Headquart… Errr,.. I mean,.. the main office!

    Me: Go F*k Yourself.

    Her: Good day sir!

    Me: Go F*k Yourself!

    Epilogue: She leaves,… the communists lose,.. I, the American wins, and got to tell another hardcore communist to,.. go f*k herself.

    JD – US Marines – Communists, socio-paths, and pyscho-paths (All the same thing for all intents and purposes) can not be reasoned or negotiated with,.. Ergo – just tell them to,… Go F*k themselves.

    1. That’s quite funny as it is my experience from a few days ago. i was pulled over by police(they do not need a reason here and you must comply).
      The cop kept trying to ask my wife questions (she was in front passenger seat) and she responded every time with ‘Go and f*k yourself’. She must have said it twenty times.
      He got snarky with her and so I explained that a recent court decision gave us every right to use those words EVEN TO A JUMPED UP LITTLE BULLY.
      It was so funny. I wish we had it on video. It would have been a youtube hit.

  3. Oh Yea Sean, when I had my accident earilier this year some “concerned citizen” called the ambulance even though it wa clear that one was not needed. I even passed two feild sobriety tests, was not bruised up or hurt and they called the damned ambulance. Well even though I refused any treatment and I didn`t wanrt their services I still got the bill for the ambulance.

  4. Sean… do you mean that your county will pay to euthanize a cat??? I wish we had it so good. Here in Yuma, we have a major feral cat problem. There have been times where we will have 20-30 of them running around the hood. If you call the police animal control, they will loan you trap to catch them yourself, but they won’t come out and do it. Then we have to take them to the humane society and pay them money to take them. I wonder if we couldn’t turn it around on the city and charge them for having unlicensed cats in my yard???? Buahahaha!!!

  5. I guess it’s different all around the country, the laws for dogs and cats. The way I understand it is if the dog catcher see’s your dog roaming the neighborhood and catches him then you owe a bunch of fines. License update, shots, kennel fee’s and so on. But if your dog is secure in your fenced in yard I believe they have to mind their own damn business. Now that makes sense to me. Also if you’re walking your dog and some “dog catcher” asks you a bunch of questions, tell them “none of your business”.

  6. Personally, I would tell them the cat was a
    friends that I was watching, while they
    went over seas on a peace corps mission.
    And that would be the end of it.
    If they asked where my friends lived, the
    answer that they would hear would be well
    out of their jurisdiction.

  7. That’s nothing Sean. You should come to Ladybird Lake in Austin here. The other day I was commenting to my wife about two signs put into the ground at the park where people take their dogs. They each said, “Remember to give your dogs lots of water. It’s hot and they only sweat 10% compared to that of humans. Remember: Play, Drink, Swim.” as though dogs lives were more important than humans.

    I said to my wife, look at this communist rhetoric. This is the kind of childlike shit we saw in China where they had signs and videos telling people how to literally walk on to a subway train and how to literally move their arms appropriately when they walk like a normal person does.

    Seriously? This nanny state shit has got to stop. I had half a mind to rip those small signs out of the ground. They are basically treating everyone like children with their condescending propaganda and bringing Chinese communist propaganda over to the U.S. and unfortunately, most people who haven’t been out of their own damn zip code, let alone state or country are too blind to see it.

  8. I believe if you’ll carefully study the applicable codes in your County/City; that you’ll find an out (so to speak) – It has been my experience in all of those cases I have dealt with on this kind of issue, that; there exists an exemption. It is usually in the form of the description, or definition, of what you “call” the animal. Such as: “Ranch dog”, or husbandry animal, etc., and/or something “other than”; “my household pet”. This exemption (in my experiance) is ALWAYS incorporated (sometimes clandestinely) within the administrative codes. Otherwise they would be mala prohibita in their entirety. Which (in County/City Codes) presents a myriad of problems a little too lengthy to go into here.
    Suffice to say: It’s been 30 years since I’ve seen a “household pet”.

  9. One hot summer day here in central Missouri, I was at China mart, and there was an animal control truck driving thru the parking lot to see if there were any dogs in people’s cars. Now I LOVE animals, and have 5 dogs of my own, but now we have another “agency” policing the parking lots to harass people, while the police SWAT teams shoot dogs first, ask questions later. Why can’t “we the people” take control of our own business, and if I saw a dog in a hot car, I’d go in and report it at the customer service counter. And I agree with NC about more care and concern shown to an animal than to a person.

    1. Exactly, Paula. I have a little Boston Terrier, but I wouldn’t go around telling people what to do with their own dogs. It’s none of my damn business nor is it the government or anyone else’s. However, if they blatantly shot or severely harmed a dog in front of me for fun, then I would make it my business, as I’m sure anyone else with a decent, human conscience would.

      Until then, I just want to yell out and say, “For cryin’ out loud, stop treating everyone like children with your Communist propaganda!!!! It sickens me to death.”

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